On The Market

Multiple Listing Service realtor agreement signed

Cleaning ladies did their best

Sisters worked like Hercules to clear the last of the “stuff” – remnants of a life

The listing posted and a bittersweet flood washed over me. As usual I have two roles in this whole business. On one hand I am called The Estate Manager- what used to be The Executor (feels like executioner) of The Estate. I have decisions to make. I have things to do. I have papers to sign and records to keep. I have rules to follow and jobs to finish. I am, as The Estate Manager, detached from my other role. The grieving daughter, the heir of the residue, the former caretaker/caregiver, of my first best friend.

There is no way to describe certain feeling and emotions except that it rolls like a tide- sometimes gently ebbing and flowing, a little misty maybe. Sometimes crashing like a tidal wave drowning my soul in tears.

This process is at times extremely frustrating. The waiting. The expectations. The bitterness. The disagreements. The pressure. The loss. The duties. The longing.

Yesterday was a day of frustration. I had to go to the bank for a couple things. There was the deposit from the estate sale. It wouldn’t go through without some glitch because it’s an estate account and it hadn’t been used yet. Then there was the mortgage payment. Fiasco. When I got frustrated and said “I just want to pay the damn mortgage”, the little fella told me not to use such language. Hahahahaha. Does he have any idea the language of this world? Not to excuse myself but in the past month I’ve had angry patients call me everything but a white woman (as my mother would say) as they, in their own distress, used profanity to cope with their own issues.

After much back and forth with the account I finally got the mortgage paid and left with a handshake with my new friend Ruan.

And then the realtor announced the listing on Redfin. And it washed over me. And I pray that a sweet family, a brilliant entrepreneur, or a group of people who just need a place to live, see that and decide it’s the perfect place for them. They can’t see the Chilean fire tree in bloom that will knock their socks off in spring. They don’t see the labor that went into the recent updates or the prior updates. They don’t see the pride she had at being a homeowner as a widow with five children. But I hope they see their future as being blessed by their own proud purchase and that they will fill it with their own collections and memories and tastes in decor.

I sent the Casa Brothers a message. They are the Realtor/Estate Sale team who have done such a great job through this ordeal. I have an idea for a new reality show with them as the stars — :

Hi guys

I just thought up a new reality show and you guys could be the stars— like property brothers except with the estate sale twist.. Casa Brothers – and the drama part would be the family melt downs and such that happens as people grieve and move thru the process of parents dying.

The vision is to my end — “save the adult children” from all the STUFF accumulated by the person who passed.

I think this is an idea that would resonate with this generation as all the baby boomers start passing and leaving the minimalist generation upcoming with all this stuff to dispose of.

I’m calling Hollywood .. get your makeup team together and get ready to be a star!!!!

Have a beautiful day
©Belindabotzong2018

The Estate Sale

It’s funny the things that run through your mind during times of high stress.

Yesterday was hard. It was hard getting the sale posted correctly to social media. Frustrating.

It was hard driving down in the early morning light and feeling so much mixed up in my head. My heart. It’s just hard.

It’s hard when the people flock in an hour early even though it specifically stated in my ad NO early birds. Please respect my family privacy. Sale starts at 9. And there they were at 8am asking if we were open yet. So rude.

It’s hard to watch people plunder even tho they were invited to plunder. It’s hard to see all the “stuff” she loved now with little red price tags. It’s hard to watch it get passed over! Isn’t that weird? This is her stuff. She loved Collections, Etc., catalogs. She loved thematic decor and it’s funny how she liked the goofy and silly more than the refined or expensive. Yet that’s what others like too. I chose the least ornate most special ones for me– and they are the ones she liked the least. Lenox. Made in Italy. They are exquisite glass. She preferred the ones that clucked and crowed and had silly expressions.

It’s hard when people come and go.

What made it easier were the people who stopped in who knew her. My best friend, Sharon, spent all day with us. She was amazing. She stayed busy all day arranging and rearranging and making suggestions and just being here. She’s also the one who showed up weeks ago with a cleaning bucket and rubber gloves and cleaned bathrooms and the kitchen and was just here and part of it all. It made me glad to have a long-time best friend of 34 years who has the gift of doing such things!

My other best friend lives far away but her dad, who will soon be 80 and who grew up next door to my mom stopped by and gave me a hug, said this really stinks, and he was so sweet. My mom used to paint his fingernails as a kid – at least that’s what she always said! Funny thing. I still vaguely remember when HIS mom, Mabel, died. She was my grandmas neighbor.

So we sold a lot of little things. A few big things and today we are back for the half price sale .. and I was thinking on the drive down about a few things.

The past few years my mom and I lived intertwined with her dependence on me being heavier and heavier. When you’re going through that it’s hard to remember some days that it’s only for a limited time. It’s like raising children – the days are long but the years are short. Some days it feels heavy and suffocating. Some days are hilarious and full of joy. About two months ago I surprised my mom by just showing up. The majority of visits the past year were scheduled with doctors appointments, errands, needs. I was feeling like I just wanted to be her kid and her to be my mom and not be needed, just wanted. So I showed up on a weekday afternoon and she was so surprised. And we didn’t go anywhere or do anything. We just sat and visited and watched something on tv and it was so refreshing I thought I might try that again someday. But then she fell again. And so that never happened again. A few months before I did a sleepover with her. She was so excited she made all my favorites. Fried chicken wings and mashed potatoes and corn.

All her stuff is being sold or donated today. People are getting deals. Making offers. Half price. It’s becoming more final. The green fuzzy monkey just sold! The curtains she just bought sold. The little pot, the mirrored tray, the picture frame. Sold.

It will all get donated to a place that cares for animals. This will be good for their auction– all the chickens and roosters and furniture.

I cry less each day but today is hard. I’m thankful for friends, cousins, and especially my sisters and my niece. And the Lord Jesus because he’s holding me together.

The Estate –

So “The Estate” cracks me up. According to The Will, “The residue” of The Estate is to be divided into four even parts. Isn’t that such a funny visual? He gets 1/4 the residue. I get 1/4 the residue. They each get 1/4 the residue. I used to tell her leaving me in charge of three crumbs and expecting us to split it four ways is a silly venture.

Anyway, The Estate now has its own bank account after my great adventure from the last post.

I called, as the Manager of The Estate, Wells Fargo last night. Lots of 800 numbers. Much punching of the buttons. Several redials. Spelling and reselling my name. Giving account numbers.

I started with the first number I found and that got me to a sweet girl named Natalie. Now that I cry less I am usually able to get through the sentence, “my mom passed away and I need help with The Estate” without melting down. Made it through that and Natalie, being maybe in her 20s, awkwardly asked, “Was it too soon?” Not sure what she meant but my reply, “I suppose when a mom dies it’s always too soon.” More awkward silence and then we move to why I’m calling. Mortgage. Credit card. Natalie gives me the phone numbers and transfers me to mortgage since that closes at a certain time but credit cards is 24 hours. Good to know. And they are on Central Time so time’s a wastin’…

I get through to mortgages where a sweet lady pours out her love, blessings, and prayers for me and my family in this time of loss. Sincerely. As if I called the crisis line she expresses how deeply saddened she is to hear about my mothers passing. She takes all the information I have and gives me a new department to call with the official title of Life Events. It isn’t open this late but she is extremely kind and lets me know that Life Events will be privileged to help me and suggests I wait until after the holiday. Her kindness almost steals a tear but I managed to thank her for her support. She transfers me to Credit Card guy. I get disconnected but since they were so smart to tell me all the numbers I’d need I redialed with only a few seconds on hold.

Then Nick in Consumer Credit answers and again I make it through the introduction and again I am consoled and comforted by a young guy who cannot quite imagine a loss like this. Nick is helpful in explaining that I will need to speak with someone in the “Deceased department”. It is actually called that! Of course it’s after hours but he says someone will “reach out” to me most likely after the holiday.

The goal in these calls is to find out what to do about two debts I’m not personally responsible for but are my responsibility to manage for The Estate. I explain that The Estate has no money, the house will be sold to satisfy those debts, and the Residue will be split evenly amongst The Heirs. In the meantime what can they do to help? And what MUST I do to protect The Estate and The Heirs. And myself. The lawyer says loan The Estate the money to keep the payments on time to avoid fees and penalties. Easy for a lawyer to say and exactly what I would prefer to do. Most people I know, however, do not carry around that kind of cash. It can be done and it will be done but if Life Events and Deceased Department can alleviate some of the pain–suspend interest, etc. that will make it much easier on everyone.

So until next week The Estate is not in focus. Thanksgiving is! Sometimes she came to Thanksgiving. She brought a ton of food, complained about my stuffing, wanted to go home right away. The past few years she preferred a TV dinner in her own house. Sometimes with a friend. Sometimes alone. She always wanted what she wanted and there was zero use in trying to change her mind. Cranberry sauce- not whole berries- in SMALL CANS ONLY- and don’t get any if there are no small cans. I say “you know it’s ok to not eat the whole can, right? If I get you a big can you know that you can save or toss the rest. You’re not required to finish it.” But no! SMALL CANS ONLY!

When the holiday is over I will contact what I suspect will be a few more compassionate people who, after I tell them why I’m calling, will bless me and commiserate with me and console me in my loss. The Life Events and the Deceased Department will be my project along with getting utilities transferred into The Estate of Janice J. Brown, Belinda Botzong, Manager.

Thank you for listening. It’s very encouraging to get a like or a comment. Follow this and you’ll be notified when I post if you’re interested. Share with others who might benefit. Or who might lose a tear or two with me. I love my mom. She was cranky and bossy and adored me. Sometimes I was not as patient with her as I’d like to remember being. Sometimes I was hypocritical at the end because I always tell people if there is no joy in your service then you’re doing it for the wrong reasons. Don’t sign up for something you are going to complain about. Do everything out of selflessness. Do everything to honor the Lord and he will bless you. It was getting harder to follow that wisdom as she was getting weaker and leaning heavily on me. She would tell me “You can fire yourself you know”. And I would roll my eyes at her and say – that’s not an option. I do everything for you just like you did everything for me. You are my mom and I love you. And now I do everything for The Estate.

©Belindabotzong2018

Moving Forward

I made it two days in a row with no tears. I even told my story twice with no tears. I think that’s moving forward. Five weeks have passed since I sat by her bed at the hospital holding her hand.

Today was a different day. Another day off work to handle the estate, as we are now calling it. Official. Judges orders. I’m the manager– what the heck is my deal with managing everything except those dang tears.

I drove down to meet the amazing team from Irongate Estates. They helped organize an entire garage full of her stuff which includes a minimum of a thousand chicken-themed items. Coasters. Figurines. Magnets. Hats. Figurines. More figurines. Chickens in every size and shape and outfit imaginable. Some not imaginable. Crazy chickens. Anyway, I would say that these are the nicest people in the world. RB, Carol, and Luke. I’m so impressed.

After a couple hours working with them I abandoned them with a promise of pizza as I headed to Mt Vernon to the lawyers office to pick up judges orders.

I got back to Sedro Woolley via the back way my mom and I always preferred – through the Nookachamps- where there were surprisingly only a small flock of snow geese or trumpeters. But still one of my favorite drives. The barns. The farms. The beauty of the Skagit Valley. And that’s when I lost a tear.

I stopped at the bank. I know most people are down on Wells Fargo as a corporation. But the ladies at this branch are so dang sweet. And Good at their jobs. And my mom adored them which I always thought was weird. Anyway.. couldn’t do the account without the official death certificate. Which I thought was in the pile from the lawyer but as part of my educational process I learned that the court keeps the original. And the only other original I have. At home. 35 miles north. Grrr. This wouldn’t be so annoying but guess what? Last week when I took everything to the lawyer to file I didn’t leave her the original will. I had made this double trip already due to all these requirements so today I was a little mad at myself.. and I still had to get pizza for the crew back at the house — so I placed an order online with Dominos and called in fresh rolls for me –and I had to pee so bad my eyes were floating. So I managed to make it across from the bank to pee, stopped to take a few pictures because I am always looking for another creation, then picked up the pizza. I must say here that the guy at Dominos in Sedro is the happiest guy. Last time I was there was to get pizza for my mom on a stressful day and he was so nice and cheerful both times. I told him he needs a raise. Good job!! (See that’s what I like– great customer service). Had to wait for Thai. But it’s worth the wait. It was what I got for my mom the last time I saw her. Fresh rolls with shrimp. While I was waiting one of my uncles friends finished lunch and was walking past me on his phone. I waved and he nodded. Then turned and handed me his phone. I said hello and it was my uncle. Haha. Small world. Small town.

Dropped off food and that lovely crew was flying through their well-rehearsed arranging and pricing …and had moved the biggest furniture without breaking a sweat. Such absolutely great people. I think I might have to change the title to Great Customer Service in times of grief.

Made it back to Bellingham, ate my fresh roll, even shared one with my son, then hit the road south — back to the bank where all went well.

I’m telling you all the details because it’s been so long since I blogged this grief experience. I had considered the past few days not sharing any more of this but for those of you who haven’t gone through it, you will. And maybe it’ll help you. Maybe it helps me.

At the end of the banking visit I had to walk to the post office down the alley behind Main Street and I did a photo shoot of all the amazing brick walls. I had to mail the letter to the lawyer agreeing to follow the rules and do my best to carry out the will of my mom.

Then I got a text from my sister just as I was heading home. Dinner! Yes!! Mexican food. At the last place my mom and I ever went out to eat. And one of my best friends mom came in with a group of ladies. The same group of ladies who were eating there that day with my mom! The Lord is good to let me hug my friends mom who was also my moms friend. Small town. Everybody knows everybody.

I came back home and organized all the estate paperwork into my fancy new binder the lawyer gave me to keep all the paperwork in.

I worked on my latest creations and now I’m going to pass out on my pillow. For some reason I’m a bit weary. But I feel blessed. Everyone I dealt with today was kind and the weather was perfection. I am thankful to be a little closer to moving forward.

©Belindabotzong2018

Recovery

I’m in recovery mode.

Recovering from international travel. While I didn’t suffer from jet lag, there is a return to “normal life” transition that has to take place as the gears get switched. From traveling daily with a large group of people, eating on a different schedule with different ingredients, and long days on a bus, in the heat, and sleeping in hotels … back to work, my own smoothies, and my own pillow!! And now processing all we did and saw and experienced. It seems a bit unreal in light of normal life!

Recovery from the trauma of grief and loss.

This, of course, will be an ongoing process of months and years. At times surreal and other times raw and wretched. Today is my first day of unplanned time since my mom left us on October 16. I have a day to do nothing if I do choose. 90 percent of the Saturday’s for the past several years involved going to see her, running errands for her, going out to lunch with her, picking up groceries for her, going on scenics with her.

This past Thursday I had to go to Sedro-Woolley to sign a paper and get a massage. As I came down Cook Road the snow geese caught my eye and tears poured down. We loved seeing the snow geese in our scenics in the fall.

Normally I would have then gone to get her and do any of the above with her. Or might have taken a nap at her house. But her house is empty and she’s not there wondering what time I said I’d be there. She’s not confused about why someone would pay good money to get a Massage. She’s not anticipating my arrival. She wasn’t holding her hairbrush in her hand when I walked through the door, saying “check my bald spot”. There was no envelope laying on the coffee table with my name written in felt tip marker with a heart over the i, filled with her bills, newspaper clippings, obituaries or sales gimmicks.

There was just an echo as I said “mommy mommy mommy why”. And I turned and left with my shattered heart.

And today I will do the mundane things that need to be done when one is recovering from travel and death. I will read the letter from the lawyer and gather the proper documents. I will pay bills and sort through papers. I will go to Whole Foods and buy almond butter. I may walk with my son at the harbor. I will work on my art as I am the featured artist this week if all weeks. I will prepare my demonstration of Petals as Paints for next Saturday when I also have no date with my mom.

Recovering daughter.

©Belindabotzong2018

Day 11-12 Israel 2018

Here I am in the shuttle from SeaTac to Bellingham- the final frontier on what seemed like a never-ending-story!

Days 11-12 all happened in one long continuous adventure!

We basically had Monday to explore on our own and we definitely did! We walked to the Cat Corner again for a cup of coffee and tea. We did a little money exchange to make sure we had exact payment for the shuttle then headed back to the hotel to check out and store our luggage for our eight hours wait. We also checked in on Charlie and Madeline. They had both been sick with this cold or upper respiratory thing some of us were suffering from. We made sure the shuttle was reserved for us and them.

We found a grocery store near the hotel where Savannah was able to find packaged halva – when we got halva at the market it’s much fresher but can’t be stored well. I got dates for Mark and some halva for everyone to try. And black dried plums like we had at breakfast every day. We took all these treasures back to the hotel to store with our luggage then hit the road on foot.

We headed back to Mahane Yahuda Market. I love that place! So much color and food and things to see and smell. I had an açaí bowl I’d been craving since our first day in Tel Aviv. It is so so so delicious. 29 shekels is expensive but it’s so worth it! We walked around trying to find something for lunch and I was very glad to find a fish&chips place!! The market had a lot of soldiers this day. They look way too young to be carrying around rifles but they were having fun eating and enjoying everything together.

We then headed across town to the Israel Museum. We passed some beautiful passionflower bushes along the way and picked a couple blossoms to add to my petals as paint on Refind Creations. Also some beautiful purple blossoms we collected in a bag.

The walk to the museum took us up a very steep hill and around the Knesset building.

We had about three hours to spend at the museum so we split up and covered as much as we could. The Dead Sea scrolls would take a lot more time but it was cool to see exhibits on many of the places we had visited on our tour and to remember things Yonatan had told us about. Could spend many hours there.

We walked back to the hotel and climbed about a hundred stairs that led up through a neighborhood. It’s fun walking everywhere — you get a whole different feel for the community.

At the hotel we went into the spa area and laid in the lounge chairs. Since the Ukraine lady wasn’t there we just made ourselves at home. Made tea and talked to a guy who came to use the steam room – and it was actually working! A couple from Russia or Ukraine came as well to steam then they used the showers in the ladies locker room together! Then they went back in the steam room and then back to the shower. They ignored us laying there on the loungers! We made tea and Savannah took a shower and I changed into my travel clothes– yoga pants and baggy shirt 😉 and bushed our teeth.

We then went to catch the shuttle and meet up with Charlie and Madeline. Glad they were able to extend for a late checkout to rest up.

The drivers in Jerusalem are crazy and the shuttle driver was crazy too! Holy moly!

We had a couple hours in the airport then we were taking off at 11:30 pm heading to New York. I took a crumb of melatonin which knocked me out for half an hour. Then a couple of hours feeling unsettled as they weirdly served meals and turned on lights rather than just letting people sleep. Super annoying! The flight was 11 1/2 hours but we coped well– better than our trip over.

We had a two hour layover in New York which was spent jumping through hoops at customs. Such a goofy process. But we didn’t have to open our bags. Savannah got a little extra grilling at check in as her passport is stamped for Indonesia, Mali and other countries.

And now to home we go! I’m craving Mexican food and a hot bath — can’t wait!

Thanks to all who followed our adventure. We have been blessed!!

©Belindabotzong2018

Day 10 -Israel 2018

Bittersweet freedom!

Today we woke up without a schedule for the first time since we left home. A much needed break from the routine of hurrying through breakfast to get on the bus. Bittersweet as we lose our daily dose of Yonatan’s teaching and the fellowship we’ve shared with the group.

At breakfast today we sat with Anna’s cousin Virginia- Anna was the lady who fell in Nazareth at the beginning of our journey. She told us how amazing America Israel Tours has been throughout this ordeal – sending an AIT representative to be with Anna at the hospital and how they have truly been there every step of the way. This is a huge thing to be grateful for and a good witness to the people who want to do a tour in the future. And a good reminder that buying trip insurance is an excellent investment!

So for our first day of freedom we decided to walk to the Mahane Yahuda Market. It was row after row of beautiful spices and fruits and candies and nuts and halva. Endless colors and textures and smells. We tried samples and ordered juice and walked and walked.

Then we decided to head over to Old Jerusalem. Along the way we got exasperated by our attempt to purchase a train ticket for our ride to the airport tomorrow. Multiple attempts to locate the holy grail of a Rav card left us a bit frustrated. We ended up talking to a guy who said the new fast train isn’t reliable enough yet and that we should ask our hotel to book us in a “special taxi” –a shuttle. We are planning to share a ride with our new friends Charlie and Madeline Burns. More about that later.

We entered the old city through the “New Gate” — we came upon a nice man who said he would like us to see his wife’s gallery. She is the only female shopkeeper. And he has a jewelry shop. Well you know we are a little leery of being hustled but sure enough he took us to meet his wife, a lovely British lady who sells art from local artists. She was so nice and she wanted to see my art which I have in the Art Market back home. She has a cat that hangs out at her shop and of course that got her and Savannah talking about feeding every stray cat in Israel that we encountered. The best part was that there was a watercolor print of that cat overlooking Jerusalem! Savannah is now the proud owner of her first piece of art!

As we left the gallery we forgot to turn left to go see her husband’s jewelry store but he caught us and turned us back toward his shop. He fuses ancient glass into beautiful jewelry and I bought a set for a Christmas gift. I am fairly sure it’s all authentic.

We had a good discussion with this couple about the concept of a “tourism mafia”. This is the thing where tour guides get a percentage of sales from prearranged visits by tour groups. This goes for restaurants and gift shops. There is a whole system designed to provide “discounts” to tourists. These coupons are tracked so the tour guides get a cut of the business it brings in. I think for restaurants this makes sense because of keeping to a fairly tight and rigorous schedule. The group sticks together and the food is done quickly. For shopping, though, it seems like a rigged system. Shop after shop sells the same exact items -/ very “cookie-cutter” souvenirs of low quality and lacking originality. Of course we bought some trinkets and gifts as any tourist does. It’s just a bit manipulated. And from what we heard it seems the little shop in Bethlehem is owned by some extravagantly wealthy families. I don’t know if it’s true but that’s what we were told.

Anyway, after shopping til we were ready to drop, time to eat. I have Schwarma and falafel coming out my pores so I really wanted something different. We sat down at one restaurant that’s upstairs over the market in the old city. We were not there but a few minutes when the guy told us if we weren’t part of a group we would need to move to another table. Grrr. So we left. We ended up going to a place Savannah ate at yesterday when she was rebelling against the tour system. They had shrimp and fries with a salad. Super expensive but again I could not think of eating schwarma or falafel.

We found our way to Jaffa gate and walked to “Cat Square” to sit and have tea and coffee. It was lovely. But then I realized I didn’t have enough shekels and they didn’t take dollars!! So I had to go find a change place and exchange a few dollars. Grrr.

Savannah fed multiple cats with the fish she took from the breakfast this morning. She has quite a routine of keeping scraps from our meals to feed the strays.

We made it back to the hotel and weary as we were thought it would be lovely to go to the pool and sauna to relax and revive. So we got our swim suits and robes and headed down to the pool. Closed. Ok let’s try the sauna. Can’t find it. No one is around in the spa area so we explored. We came out and a Ukrainian lady was at the front desk. She didn’t understand English. Sign language worked well enough and she took us to the sauna. A cold cold room with no controls and no steam. We went to find her and she was watching tv! So we just left and headed back to our room. Apparently Leonardo does not open the pool in the fall and apparently the spa is only an idea.

Another frustrating thing we encountered today was mentioned earlier — trying to get an affordable and reliable trip to the airport! Everyone we ask has a different idea. I had asked AIT what to do before we came on the tour and they said the hotel would get us taken care of. Well the hotel does not have a concierge and the guy Savannah talked to yesterday said it would be 350 Israeli Shekels for a taxi! That’s about a hundred bucks. Heck no. Yonatan said to ask for a special taxi (shuttle) and that it should be no more than 30 IS each. .. and so did the guys at the info place we talked to today. We really wanted to take that new fast train as it’s free but no one trusts the service time on that. So we went back to the hotel front desk and told the guy we need to arrange a shuttle for us and two others from our group. He says it’ll be 67 IS each! He tried calling to make the reservation but couldn’t get through. He said to check back in a couple hours and we were then told it’s confirmed! Goodness. Makes me wish we had just gone home when everyone else did tonight and it would have been all taken care of!

So here we are. Our last night in Jerusalem is underway! We have met so many lovely people. We have been blessed with such great care. Having Yonatan as our guide was such a blessing-/ we always felt safe and cared for. We never had to worry about anything because he knew exactly what to do in each situation. It’s bittersweet for sure. So thankful that we had this opportunity and I will always pray for the peace of Jerusalem and blessings on the Christians who are bound to live separated from the rest of the world in Palestine.

©Belindabotzong2018

Day 9, cont. Israel 2018

We just returned from an amazing show at King David’s – beautiful laser light show about the life and times of my favorite guy in the Old Testament.

As we were following Yonatan without our whisper devices for the first time we were talking about how it’s been this past week– if you wandered too far from his voice it became difficult to hear him and follow along. But as you moved close to him we could hear him loud and clear. This leads to a spiritual lesson. When God speaks he often whispers. If you’ve moved away from him too far it’s hard to understand or follow what he’s saying. And, just like when we were following Yonatan, when you wander too far you can start feeling afraid of getting lost or left behind.

It has been a trip of a lifetime. I’m so glad my mom wanted me to go and so glad she’s up there with Jesus for the past few weeks, seeing our adventure from his presence.

The tomb is empty. The cross is empty. Jesus rose in victory over 2000 years ago and the whole world is drawn to see the evidence of his life and times. He came to save and redeem and forgive all of us. Jew, gentile, Palestinian, Israeli, Black, white. Wise men still seek him. If you ever get the opportunity to come, take it. It’s not a vacation — it’s a spiritual adventure into the roots of our faith.

“Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: “May those who love you be secure. May there be peace within your walls and security within your citadels.” For the sake of my family and friends, I will say, “Peace be within you.” For the sake of the house of the Lord our God, I will seek your prosperity.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭122:6-9‬ ‭NIV‬‬

©Belindabotzong2018

Day 9 – Israel 2018

Today was a full day in Jerusalem.

We entered the Jaffa gate and visited the 14 stations of the cross over the course of the day. We went to the place where pontius Pilate put Jesus on trial. We visited the place where Jesus was flogged. We walked along via de la Rosa – through the Christian section, the Jewish section, and the Muslim section. We visited the area where Catholics believe Jesus was killed and buried. That site was pure chaos and I was glad we moved through that area as quickly as we could. It really upset me that people there are acting so unholy. Pushing and shoving and getting angry. So awful.

We saw all the different sites and several churches and the site of the pool of Bethesda where Jesus healed on the sabbath.

Our very long trek ended at the tomb of Jesus in the Christian tradition. It was very well organized for getting everyone through. They said about 3000 a day go into the tomb. Afterward we had communion together and it was lovely.

One thing I experienced was that when there are so many people in one place it is very hard to focus on the deeper emotions and experience the true meaning of everything.

Oh – and I should say here that I accomplished the mission to get my mom a shofar. I went for a rams horn approximately 14 inches long. Yonatan blew it for me so I can now say it’s authentic!

We have traveled this past week with the nicest people and our tour guide has been excellent. I highly recommend that everyone takes the time to explore the roots of our faith. I will never read the Bible in the same way. I am blessed to be a pilgrim of Israel.

“Pray for the peace of Jerusalem: “May those who love you be secure. May there be peace within your walls and security within your citadels.” For the sake of my family and friends, I will say, “Peace be within you.” For the sake of the house of the Lord our God, I will seek your prosperity.”

‭‭Psalm‬ ‭122:6-9‬ ‭NIV‬‬

©Belindabotzong2018

Day 8 – Israel 2018

O Little Town if Bethlehem

How still we see thee lie..

Today was very interesting, humbling, educational and enlightening.

Our world view is so easily shaped by the news, politicians, the internet, and prejudice.

Today at least we can say that 35 Americans along with their brilliant and fearless Jewish guide were able to have our world views impacted by a beautiful, precious, and amazing Palestinian Christian named Barbara. I can almost promise that when you hear the word Palestinian most Americans do not envision such a lovely thing as meeting one who is Christian.

And I’ll go as far as to say that most of us have no clue that Bethlehem is in what is now Palestinian territory. And I know for certain most have no idea that there even are Christian Palestinians.

We took the bus into this territory so that we could visit the birthplace of Jesus. It was miraculous that we did not have to wait long as it is usually very crowded.

First stop was at a beautiful gift shop operated by a Christian artist cooperative, Handmade items carved from olive tree wood —nativities so elaborate and ornaments, jewelry, trinkets, and so many beautiful things.

We were a bit taken aback by the people selling on the streets — very aggressively — and its hard not to hand all your money to a little boy holding onto his sheep as you enter the town. Adorable little gig he had going there. Poverty is obvious and a bit overwhelming.

Barbara was delightful and answered all our curiosities graciously. She cannot travel freely. She cannot come to Jerusalem. She has lived in Bethlehem all her life and says there is little to do — no entertainment. Basically except for her tour guide position she dabbles in learning to paint and hangs out with her friends. She lives with her entire extended family – parents, married brothers and their children. She has been to America once to visit a relative in Sacramento. To fly anywhere they must travel to Amman Jordan.

When we arrived at the church where the manger is, Barbara navigated us all through a crowded scene. We had to go down into the area under the church and there is a 14point Star where it is believed Jesus was born and an area where the manger would have been. This church is separated into sections based on three sects that have claim on it. Orthodox Greek and Russian if I remember right and one other. It is very ornate and unusual. It was too hot and crowded for me to fully experience what I was seeing. But I’m glad we got to go.

Next stop was Shepard’s Field — the area where flocks would have been kept and where the angels would have appeared to announce “Peace on Earth, Good Will to Men”.

After this we walked to a restaurant. A lady named Ruth, another Palestinian Christian, owns this place and did a lovely job of feeding our massive group– schwarma and falafel, as usual. We bid Barbara a fond farewell and gave her a freewill offering into Yonatan’s hat.

This was all so valuable in helping us grasp even a tiny bit of reality.

We then headed to Mt. Zion and went to the place where Peter denied Jesus. A beautiful church. Then to the place where Jesus was held for trial. And to King David’s tomb, and to one place where Mary may have been buried.

We had to rush through as Shabbat was about to begin but there was so much beauty in the mosaics and paintings I’m glad we got to see it even briefly.

We have been blessed to get to know some of the people in our group, to know Barbara, Jonatan, and most of all to learn more about the roots of our faith!

©Belindabotzong2018